The Discourses of Dr. Oso and the young neophyte.

YN-But here again dear doctor I find myself adrift with no sure anchor. Tell me then, what does one do who is so unwise in the ways of things?

DO-Hail then dear friend! What then has you so inclined to melancholy? Has indeed it been that trip you planned to Philadelphia or has your studies led you to such uncertainty?

YN- Alas indeed my trip to Philadelphia ended so badly as to see me tossed at the foot of the chapel alone and quite disheveled. Surely this adds to my demise but there is something deeper to blame I can be sure. Surely the fact that my season with you must come to an end someday soon plays a part in my unease but what again about my peculiar fondness for the peculiar? I could not help but think your teachings regarding the intellectual virtues seem vague and out of reach in the light of this place where people seem so incensed to raise up the self and break the bonds that bind in the name of progress.

DO- Stop there apt pupil and let us discuss these questions in the order that they assault you. But wait, what then is this that seems branded on your chest?

YN- Oh I had hoped that your eyes would not fall on it. For it weighs heavy and confuses me. It was placed there by the powers that be to foil any musings I might have had.

DO-But what then does it say? DB…F? How strange that someone would feel the need to brand you with D.B.F. As I search my mind I can find no possible meaning for it. Do you know its meaning?

YN- It has been on my mind but I can find no answer. I truly would rather consider other things for this seems to be such a small ordeal although its odd location and enigmatic message I do not doubt will dominate thoughts of me.

DO- Oh no son order this branding of the utmost importance for surely you will find no peace until it is removed or explained.

YN- But venerable friend the burden will surely fade because I can undoubtedly depend on the kindness of those who saw fit to place it to see their selfish plans out and tire and order it removed. The weight of things to come and even my next breath, should not they hold my attention and not the blight that I can offer no defense against. Why can I not depend on grace?

DO- Grace? But have you not so soon forgot the lesson I delivered, Grace is nothing but the uninformed absence of reason. The only way to remove this brand is to engage to their fullest extent our excellent reason and empirical faculties and seek to discern the riddle that you wear. Once we know the meaning then we can petition for grace and the other ephemeral things that appear a faint gray against the firm black and white of our own intellect.

YN- But my mind, can it see me past my last breath or will it not fall to dust someday like my now pained heart? No I must insist teacher that no workings of the mind can unravel the knot tied by a heart self-consumed and spurned. I am a lens never in focus, only in the faded gray of grace can a day soon find me without this brand. But see here! I have allowed it to dominate me and how great my embarrassment will be whenever I am seen! What then teacher shall I retreat to the shelter of my homeland or brush the dust of this land off my feet and seek out a new beginning?

DO- Oh dear I fear this may be beyond any advice I could offer you, have you sought out the counsel of our most wise and intelligent creator? But surely this must be the answer, I am ashamed to say I have reached this point so tardily I must deeply reflect on this late into tonight. Oh it has struck me just now! Your brand could indeed mean Boyish Belief Forever!

YN- I would answer then sir that maybe this brand would mean Do not Belie Faith in your case. For surely your own expectations have clouded you for your letters find no match on my person. I had truly hoped you would be able to reveal my brand for I do indeed know its nature and it seems to be beyond you. I am rended, my heart knows my head naught and in the same way in reverse. I cannot for my life find grounds for this brand, for what then was my crime but to seek out what I am raised to seek and to then put behind me the things that I have learned profit me not? Assuredly if I am not a child of grace then I am lost because there are no fast and sure answers to be had in this place. Dear doctor let me then take your leave and consider this further although I must admit I leave your presence doubting the very core of all that has been taught me. I will raise prayer tonight then that the morning rays do not find me a most despicable cynic as one who tosses away the invisible wind for the cold plains of skepticism.

PRETTY (Please Read Everything That This Yaks….about)

Everyone loves acrostics. BUYTHIS (by ultimately yelling towards history isotopes surge?). It seems a group/company/church cannot assume a vision or implement a new strategy without shrinking and cramming it into letters that will not challenge our apparently feeble brain power. I would classify it as TISK (totally insanely stupid ‘k?). It would be as to cutting out the Mona Lisa in body and dropping the background, eating the white part of the bread and NETCETISH (not eating the crust even though it is healthy), delivering a rousing defense of a friend from prison but leaving out the entire story up to your claim of his innocence. You hamstring the vision, slim down the strategy and serve up an emaciated piece of fluff that seeks to stick in our minds with a catchy array of letters that dictates to the idea how it will be known instead of the idea dictating to the carrying mechanism. We could chalk it up to the next step in the simplifying manifesto that this country takes way to close to the heart. We cut down letters (silent “h” you are next), strive for anything we can put “micro” or “concise” in front of, and masquerade as making life better when in fact we mask a most terrible sluggard. We allow everyday for the center of our very knowledge to be fed us through computer screens and televisions and away from the intuition and sensing of our own intellect. I could call it NUMB but I really could not capture the idea of just how terrible this is by limiting it to four letters even though the word adds strength. Never Ultimately Mumble ‘Bout….the past. New Ultimatum Might Be trouble. I will hand this one off to the 79.6 percent of the business schools graduates out there who majored in that great enigma “marketing”. They are well trained in knowing what you want and hopefully someday soon telling you what to know.

Ironically you may have stopped reading this piece by now because of length. For those who have reached this point I thank you for your diligence and or strange disposition that allow you to subject yourself to such ramblings. For the majority of you who never made it past the word “acrostic” I offer the following which will put the 235 million “marketers” out there out of work by skipping them outright. Behold! “Acrostic Text” where the entire work is written in easy to understand and digest simplicity.

ELC. BUYTHIS(BUYTHIS?) ISAG/C/CCAAVORANSWSACIILTWNCOAFBP. IWCIATISK(TIS’K?). IWATCOTMLIBADTB,ETWPOTBANETCETISH(NETCETISH), DARDOAFFPBLOTESUTYCOHI.YHTV,SDTSASUAEPOFTSTSIOMWACAOLTDTTIHIWBKIOTIDTTCM. WCCIUTTNSITSMTTCTWTCTTH.WCDL(S”H”YAN), SFAWCP”M”O”C”IFO,AMAMLBWIFWMAMTS. WAEFTCOOVKTBFUTCSATAAFTIASOOOI. I CCINUMBBURCNCTIOFHTTIBLITFLETTWAS.NUMB…TP. NUMBT. I WHTOOTT79.6PFTBSGOTWMITGE”M”.

IYMHSRTPBNBOL. FTWHRTPITYFYDAOSDTAYTSYTSR. FTMOYWNMIPTW”A” IOTFWWPT235M”M”OTOOWBSTO. B!”AT”WTEWIWIETUADS.

The above acrostic stands for “Just Let Us Do The Thinking For You And Do Not Mind The Forrest Save The Tree Sitting Two Inches From Your Nose”.